It’s Amazing What People Didn’t Learn in Kindergarten
I'm coming off being exceptionally angry with a Vendor. I got a Diet Coke, had a few sips, and tried to calm down, when it hit me - It's amazing what these people didn't lean in Kindergarten. No really... from the poster/book All I really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten I'm amazed that these people didn't learn these things.
Maybe they did, but when they deal with us, they casually "forget" the important things: Don't lie... Be Honest... Take responsibility when it's yours to take, and help people even if it isn't. These are simple things. We expect them from our kids - we tell them to tell us the truth, and we honestly go easier on them when they are honest and tell us the truth. It really does work.
So why do people dealing with a 'customer' act differently?
If it simply because they want to look good? I don't think so. I don't think these contacts at the Vendor really even care if they are seen as nice and helpful, or mean and unhelpful. Does it effect their pay? No. They do a job for a company, and unless it costs the company money (like a client leaving) they're not going to get involved. So I don't think they care about being seen as nice. They just don't want to get fired for losing a client.
Is it because they need to protect the company's reputation? That probably happens sometimes, but in a big global corporation, they are more interested in who recommends them and not necessarily likes them. Face it... Oracle might not be liked but they are going to be used by people because of their reputation. So, I don't think it's for the company's image they do this - again, most of the time.
I think it's because they know their product has faults - everything does, and when they are confronted by it, their first instinct might be to confess the short-coming, but then a call from here is made to there, and CTOs are involved, and all of a sudden honesty evaporates. All because someone else, higher up in the chain of the vendor, starts to scream.
They're being a bully to their people. Nothing more, nothing less. These people dared to tell us the truth, which was uncomfortable for them and for us. But if it was the truth, then we should know that, do our best to deal with it and move on. This isn't the time to bring out the rubber hoses and beat people on the feet... it's a time to recognize the limitations of something and work within those limitations to try and make something that might work.
There's two ways to handle disappointment - suck on the sour lemon, or make lemonade. I'm all for the latter. Let's try to remember what we learned in Kindergarten - take turns, share, work together... all these things are going to make the situation better not worse.