Things are Getting Complicated it Seems

I was in a meeting today - talking about an interview that was coming up today and the guy looking to make this hire was very explicit about the type of person he was looking to get: Type A. Serious go-getter. You know… me. OK… people like me - and he specifically talked about hiring from the finance industry here in Chicago. I smiled - maybe even giggled a little bit, and he asked me what that was about.

I explained what had been on my mind for a while: Was this place really ready for the kind of change that these kinds of hires was going to represent? I was very specific about the fact that I honestly had no idea what the long-term effects were going to be, but just based on my experience, I know that there was certainly going to be a division based solely on physical things like hours worked, and hours not worked while playing ping-pong.

These simple things, and the drive, intensity and others are going to make it clear to everyone that these new developers are not at all like the others here now. My fear is that the critical developers we have now will see this, sense the winds of change, and decide that this is no longer the place they know and love, and simply leave. It won't have to be all at once, but if the right few leave, then it'll be very hard to continue the development of the existing web apps, and then more significant changes will have to take place.

It could easily turn into an avalanche where a few Type A groups make enough of the old guard uncomfortable, and that forces even more of the new to replace/retool/re-work the old apps, and that makes even more old guard jittery, etc. It can be a nasty feedback cycle that causes a massive change in the landscape in a very short time.

So I was talking with my manager about this, and it quickly got to the point that we needed to talk about what's happening with me and this group.

They love the work I do. He said he's never seen anyone work anything like what I do. But he also sees that the other guys in the group are complaining about the fact that I'm taking ownership of too much - making it hard for them to feel involved in the project. I explained myself, and it's clear that we had the same situation that I've had several times before - I work to the point that others feel threatened, marginalized, and then they resent me even though there's nothing to resent. Not really.

I'm working on the things we, as a group, need to do. I'm doing my best to do this in the same way that I'm seeing them set by example. After all, I'm no great ruby coder - or clojure coder. I'm looking at what they do - how they do it, and following along as best I can.

I just happen to do it about four times their speed.

In the beginning, I was "cute" and interesting. Now that I've gotten up to speed, I'm not so cute, and I'm becoming a real annoyance to them. I get it. I really do. But I'm not doing any of this to be a trouble-maker. I'm doing this because I think this is what I should be doing. This is just how I work.

I'm 51, for Pete's sake! Aren't they the 20-somethings supposed to be showing this "Old Man" how things are done? Why are they crying "Uncle!"?

So I have to now work harder at including them. I do. I don't take things over. I don't change their code without serious reason, and when I do I document the heck out of 'why'. I am trying to fit in, but it's not turning out that way.

My manager is talking about finding something for me to do that's outside this, and building a team around me. But I know the key factor is that what I'm on now is the most important project he's got, and to take me off that is just crazy in management's mind. I'm the one that's making everyone breathe easy on this one. So to take me off now just isn't happening.

But I'm a problem for the guys in the group, it seems.

I wish I knew what to do - other than the obvious. The thing that pops to mind is a simple group chat. Plain, simple, clear the air. I don't expect anyone to change their minds, but it will at least let them know that I mean them no harm, and that it's all up to them. They get to choose how hard to work. They get to choose when to work. They choose.

Not me. Them.

And when they realize that - that it's less about me than them, then maybe - just maybe, they'll start to see that it's not me that's the problem.